Do kids really need Brithday Parties?

I’ve heard the argument so many times… Do kids really need birthday parties?

As a party planner of course I would say yes, because it wouldn’t make good business sense to say no, however it’s more than just that.

Parties are great way for children to build social skills, self-esteem and build memories to last a lifetime. Ironically I grew up in a home where birthday parties were non-existent; celebrating your birthday was only done with your immediate family. And while I don’t fault my parent’s generation for that way of thinking, having a party would have been so much fun.

So while I plead the case for throwing kids parties, I must caution however the extent in which parents should go to please their little Princess or Prince. Recent reality shows depict the outrageous when throwing a party. How parents will go above and beyond sometimes just to through the biggest and best party on the street. But is all this necessary? No.

A party for your child could be as simple as inviting over a few friends, doing some crafts, eating cake and just relishing in the day of friendship. If you aren’t that creative there are many party planning services that specialize in creating a party atmosphere for your child. Of course there is a fee for this service so be sure to shop around for the best prices and packages.

Having been in the business I have seen my share of party disasters and successes. One thing that is very important to me is that the kids are having fun. And while I know my services create a great deal of fun, the definition of fun is whether or not the kids are engaging with each other. Many times I have been to parties that seem to be broken into different groups; there are the school friends, the cousins, the friends whose parents are friends of the birthday child and the neighbours. This makes for an awkward party because there is usually someone who is going to be left out. Remember this is your child’s party not yours and you aren’t going to please everyone, so let them decide who they want to invite. Parties are about fun not tears.

Another rule I strongly agree with is don’t have more guests than the child’s age. A four-year child does not have the social skills to interact properly with 10 kids. It’s even difficult for an adult to give that many people their full attention at a party, so think about the stress it would put on your four-year old.

The important thing to remember is parties need not be lavish as long as they are fun and everyone is having a good time. The sound of children’s laughter and watching them interact, telling secrets and bonding is what birthday parties are about. They should never be stressful for anyone.

Below are other child birthday party ideas and tips to be considered:

1. It is not advisable to give out invitations at school especially when you are not inviting the entire class. For some, not receiving an invitation could be viewed as a source of rejection.
2. When choosing the party theme make it about what the child wants, NOT what interests you. The child should be excited about his or her party.
3. Take plenty of photos, individual and group shots, so that each child goes home with at least one photo.
4. Hand out any loot bags when the children are leaving to go home. This will avoid anything being misplaced or forgotten. Also make sure all bags are identical, you don’t want someone crying over what they didn’t get.
5. Lastly treat all the children the same as the birthday child. They all know it’s his or her special day, but don’t make them feel like the ‘guest’ at the party. While the party is to celebrate a birthday it’s also about the guests so make them feel special too.

Ultimately, only you and your child can decide what works best.

-RaDeana Montgomery is the owner/operator of the Perfectly Pampered Prince and Princess. Specializing in Spa, Rock Star, Pirate and Superhero parties.

Managing September Sign-ups…

September doesn’t only mark the return of another school year but it is also registration season and the return to a routine. As parents, it isn’t hard to get caught up in the dreams of our children striving to become the next best NHL star or a prima ballerina. But these dreams sometimes come at a cost not only financially but to the health and well-being of those involved.

Studies have proven time and time again that participation in after-school activities benefit children. Not only does it keep our kids active and out of trouble, but extra activities enhance self-esteem, build team work skills and teach kids how to multi-task- giving them a better advantage in life when they enter post-secondary school. Team sports also teach kids about learning to accept success and disappointments.

So while there is positive proof that extra-curricular activities are good for kids, organizing too many things may actually be harmful. Burn out, lower grades, stress and overwhelming feelings are some of the negative effects of too much activity.

So how does the balancing act work? First consider the following points…

1. Quality time together. Even though some days will be filled with a hectic pace of getting kids to their programs, make sure that there is a good balance between activities and home life. Sit down and enjoy as many meals together as you can.
2. Decide what activities are the most important to your child. Sure you may want them to know how to swim, dance, play hockey, or play an instrument but do they really want to do all that? Keep it simple, a child who is passionate about what they are doing will excel better than one that is just simply doing it.
3. If you are new to the extracurricular activities it is a good idea to do your research to find out what is available in your community. Talk to other parents to see what they are doing – they are the best resources at recommending facilities that suit your needs. Then take it slow. Don’t sign up for 7 things at once. Try one or two days of activities for the first year and see how that goes.
4. Sometimes smaller communities are not equipped with the most activities and drives to a larger centre will provide more opportunities, but remember every time you are in the car commuting it is less time you are spending doing something else. Staying local saves time, as well it is a great investment in your community.

Even though at times we try as parents to be superhero’s and be everywhere at one time, just remember it is impossible, so don’t try and do it all. There are already enough stresses in life so don’t add more to your plate than you can handle. Remember kids need to be kids, and extra activities should be a choice not a burden, something that is fun not something that everyone dreads doing.

- RaDeana Montgomery is a local parent and owner of The Perfectly Pampered Princess.

Is Buying Organic Worth the Extra Expense?

I have been on a real organic “kick” for the last year. For the most part, I have always eaten well and taken care of myself. But recently I have been introduced to the world of organic products; not just food but clothing, toys, and other consumer goods. Looking at the price difference between the organic products and the regular products, my wallet was not too impressed with its lack of padding. The organic items were more expensive in the initial cost and that was a bit daunting for someone like me, or let’s face it – most of us, who are on a tight budget. So I did a little research to determine if buying the organic products was really worth the extra money. Yes, yes, and yes! Let me tell you why…

1. Buying organic makes a HUGE impact on the environment. In production, these items are produced in a more environmentally friendly way, usually with sustainable materials and less chemicals. You may never live to see the difference it makes but your children and grandchildren will.

2. Organic products are healthier for you and your family, and I am not just talking about organic food. Many consumer products are made with materials that contain a ton of chemicals and dyes that can harm our bodies. Many scientists believe that there is a link between phthalates (PVC) and ADHD in teens and children. Organic products contain no chemically based dyes, paints or materials. They will contain no PVC, lead, cadmium, or BPA. All these chemicals can seep into your skin or be absorbed in your children’s saliva. Think about what your children are wearing or putting into their mouths.

3. Organic products may cost more but they typically last a lot longer and are considerably more durable. They are also easier to wash and deteriorate less over time and repeat washings. Cheaper items that can be purchased at big box chains are inexpensive because they are not meant to last long or be handed down from one child to another. The better quality brands, especially the organic items, will last – on average – 3 times as long. Even if you are paying double the price for an item, the long-term cost savings make it worth the purchase. All 5 children in my family have worn the same pair of name brand overalls that my mother purchased for me in 1979, and they were not the cheap ones. Apparently I may end up getting them as a baby shower gift!

I could list several more reasons that I have found that give me incentive to purchase organically made products. But, when it all comes down to it, the number one reason is VALUE – I get a better product at a reasonable price.

- Danielle DuBois is the owner of The Small Business Place and one of the Lead Bloggers at Destination Kidz

Dance – What are the real benefits?

Dance is a beautiful expression of emotions. It allows for creativity and can transport the dancer and the audience to another place or time. Aside from the obvious physical benefits – building muscle, strength, agility and balance – dance also provides many social benefits.

Studies have shown that dance builds more confidence, coordination and poise. Children who dance become less concerned with body image and more focused on performing for enjoyment. Building self-esteem in children is important to their development as adults. With dance, children are placed by age and skill level. Accomplishing different techniques and routines creates a sense of self worth for the child. The artistry and technique of being able to create moves to music is also a very satisfying experience for even a young dancer.

Not only is dance fun but it is also educational and has been attributed to kids excelling in school. Like any extra curricular activity, it teaches kids to think outside the box as well as how to multi-task.

Dancing is not just for girls, boys are becoming more active in dance thanks in part to the evolution of dance shows and music videos, not to mention the originals Fred Estaire and Gene Kelly. More boys are partaking in dance because it is viewed as a cool thing to do.

In addition to self-esteem building, dance can help to reinforce a sense of pride especially in children who struggle with being different. For example, a child who wears glasses, has braces or may not fit the body type of a dancer, feels a sense of pride and the euphoria of stepping onto a stage and into a different world.

Grace and poise are two other key benefits to dance. By learning different positions and steps, children can utilize all parts of their bodies. Dance technique in fact has been used to train professional athletes allowing them to move their bodies without injuring themselves.

Dance also teaches discipline. The longer a child dances, the more respect for others and themselves they will develop. Remember dance isn’t about competition or winning awards. It’s about expression, fitness, developing balance and building self-esteem.

Dancing is like dreaming with your feet.

- RaDeana Montgomery is a local mom whose daughters have been in dance for over 10 years.